September's theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faithfulness. Kermit Rowe, one of our Relationship Facilitators shares about the skills needed for a lasting marriage, that many times are in short supply.
Devotion and faithfulness seem to be in short supply in our culture these days. So, when you see these two qualities alive and well in a lasting marriage, you’ve got to wonder what that couple has that about 50 percent of the couples who enter into holy matrimony don’t.
By: Abby Glaser
Encompass Community Advocate
When our Outreach Coordinator told me this month’s topic is devotion and faithfulness…my first thought was that I didn’t have anything to say on that topic! Which is ironic since I have been with my husband for 25 years now. I suppose I do know a thing or two! While the definition of devotion includes love and loyalty, which is what most think of when they hear that word, it also includes “enthusiasm!" That definitely got my brain thinking… when was the last time I expressed enthusiasm for my partner?
The online resource guide, Children and Divorce, comes to us from Milavetz Law, P.A. in Minnesota with the following topics:
It is consistent with the research we have seen and reviewed over the past two decades.
In addition, here is a Financial Guide to Divorce with Kids from Annuity.org. "If you are a parent planning your post-divorce future, it's important to remember that your children may be your biggest expense. According to the Brookings Institution, raising a child from birth to 17 years old can accumulate to more than $300,000."
We are glad to help you explore alternatives to divorce.
The September theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faith. Gina Craun and her family experienced the ultimate loss, but through it all maintained their faith and devotion to each other and to God. See where it's brought them in the following blog post by Gina.
This was my 3 year old daughter's bold and unquestioning response when I asked her what she learned in her class while I was in service one Sunday. I laughed and asked her what she meant and, without even looking up from the sucker she was trying desperately to unwrap, she informed me, “They said that Jesus lives in my heart… so I think right now He’s cookin’ in there.”
And you know what… I can’t disagree.
When our oldest son, Cainan, was 2 years old he was playing on the floor with his cars and seemed a bit sluggish. When I felt his body burning up again, with yet another fever that month, we took him to our family doctor to get some antibiotics. Little did we know that within 24 hours we would be packing overnight bags and be admitted to the closest children’s hospital. Within hours, our world was turned upside down and the word “leukemia” entered our daily vocabulary. Because of the strength his specific type of leukemia possessed, chemo alone was not going to be enough. We began prepping for a bone marrow transplant. A transplant that our oldest son at 2 would be receiving and our youngest son, at 11 months old, would be donating bone marrow for.
During this time I began an online journal. It was my goal to find God’s plan and purpose in each day and each step of our journey and share that hope and light with others. I found such encouragement in this because… you see what you look for. And I wanted to see what God was cooking up for our family through this.
Encompass Executive Director Lavern Nissley shared this 23-minute SOUL Talk presentation on "The Good: Investing in Healthy Families and Relationships" at The Nehemiah Foundation's annual Case for Community Summit September 8, 2023.
You may want to download a number of items he refers to in the presentation:
The September theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faith. As always, there will be relationship health connections in terms of insights, tips, and tools.
By Lavern Nissley
Executive Director of Encompass
Would you agree that family is the primary means of transmitting faith to the next generation? It certainly seems clear from a familiar scripture in the Jewish Torah known as the Shema in Deuteronomy 6:4-9.
“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”
So how is that done in our setting, some 3,500 years later? Is anyone actually writing stuff on doorframes and wearing headbands with faith messages?
By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach & Event Coordinator
There is a reason the phrase “for richer or poorer” is included in the marriage vows. Money is the second leading cause of divorce (behind infidelity.) Regardless of how much you love your spouse, money can be a major source of frustration and contention in a relationship… especially when you love to shop and OH, HOW I LOVE TO SHOP! I love it even more when there is a good deal to be had! I mean who can resist a “like new” accent chair in the exact color of the living room for HALF the original price? (Not me.) My dopamine receptors go crazy when I click that Marketplace tab and find aaaall the things!
My easy-going husband is so good to me. He loves to hear excitement in my voice. So, when I start to talk about all the great deals I’ve found during the week on Marketplace, it’s cute and makes him giggle… until it doesn’t. When it’s time to get serious about saving money, I steer clear of the Marketplace tab. Here are a few suggestions that you might find helpful as I have, when I am trying to save money:
The theme for August posts will be Finances/Money in Marriage, which seems to be a common issue between spouses. This post is a bit longer than usual and comes from Ron Blue, a financial planner and consultant for more than 30 years with some excellent tips.
Here is the summary of Ron Blue's post as well as an outline of the content.
"Teaching kids about money is a matter of sharing your ideas and values with your kids as you go through the routines of daily life together."
Motivation: The current cultural climate
Foundation: Biblical perspectives and principles
Application: Putting beliefs and ideals to work
Method: "As you go" while teaching kids about money
Our appreciation to Ron Blue for this content.
The theme for August posts will be Finances/Money in Marriage, which seems to be a common issue between spouses. This post is a reprint from September, 2020.
By Lavern Nissley
Encompass Executive Director
Spender. Saver. Risk-taker. Security seeker. Flyer. All ways of how people are "wired" around money.
Even as there are behavioral personality characteristics such as outgoing, reserved, confident, calm, etc., there are also personality types related to our engagement with money and financial management.
Differing money personalities can create disagreements and even major conflicts in marriages, families, groups and organizations. But learning your own money personality(ies) can bring insights and more realistic expectations. Discover your money personality in about 3 minutes through a FREE online assessment that we've developed for use in The RINGS Experience.
The theme for August posts will be Finances/Money in Marriage, which seems to be a common issue between spouses.
By Lavern Nissley
Encompass Executive Director
"Money is the root of all evil", right?
Wrong. It is the LOVE of money that creates problems. Ronda and I have watched this play out dozens of times on Dateline, the NBC show of 31 seasons that specializes in "compelling mysteries, powerful documentaries, and in-depth investigations." Typically, one or both partners are on a trajectory that has them loving money or pursuing sex outside of the relationship and ending in murder.
But marriage and money CAN go together well, provided that the following tips are followed. If implemented, we can almost guarantee that you won't end up on Dateline!
Lavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships.