 By Lavern Nissley
I noticed a recent Facebook post by good friend Jeff Pinkleton about his annual check in with daughter, Leah. He referenced an article from All Pro Dad that provides a helpful framework for doing annual check ins with his kids. Could be appropriate for more frequent than annual, if that's a better rhythm for you. Want to see the questions?
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 By Lavern Nissley
(reprinted from November 18, 2018 post) "Couples who sweat together, stay together." Really? Yeah, research actually supports surprising benefits from exercising together. Want to know more? And details on an upcoming local opportunity to participate in a couple's boot camp? A 2014 post in Psychology Today cites lab studies that "after jointly participating in an exciting physical challenge or activity, couples report feeling more satisfied with their relationships and more in love with their partner." Apparently, the physiological arousal in being active together stimulates romantic attraction.  Pets often become almost like family members. And when they pass, the loss and grief are real and gripping. It's normal to feel sad, weepy and even depressed as you're coping with not having that special companion nearby anymore.
Our daughter-in-law, Emily, shared a brief reflection on the recent passing of her dog after 9 years of faithful companionship. It is moving and thoughtful, and not just a little bit tear-inducing.  We just celebrated our 41st anniversary this past Sunday, December 29. Even after all these years, there is a habit we've been practicing to keep our marriage fresh and satisfying. Daily. In the morning. On our living room couch. We consider it crucial to our connection, communication and sense of marriage purpose.
Don't get us wrong, we've messed up quite often the past four decades, but doing this habit daily since March, 1990 has been a game-changer for us. Are you wondering what it is?  By Kermit Rowe
(Kermit is a relationship facilitator with Encompass) There’s no denying it … the holiday rush has kicked into high gear. Finishing the shopping and baking, the decoration hanging and last-second plan-making. Lots of “-ings” but not lots of time left to be “finish-ing” them. What’s a person to do? Or for the purposes of this post, what’s a couple to do? While checking our list twice, we do well to ask ourselves who should be at the top of that list.  By Lavern Nissley
How do you respond when someone you’ve just met remembers your name and uses it multiple times in your first exchange? How is your impression of that person different from one who refers to you in more generic terms like friend, sister or bud? Is the effort and concentration required to learn people's names worth it?  By Abby Glaser
I read a fantastic article this week addressing how to talk to someone experiencing crisis. I encourage you to read the whole article. It explains something called “Ring Theory”.  By Lavern Nissley
Ronda and I are facilitating relationship skills training in Costa Rica with 36 students preparing for missions and service outreach in Central America. A unique aspect of this training is that all of our sessions are needing to be interpreted into Spanish, as about half of the students understand limited English. It got us thinking about how often we might benefit from an interpreter, even while speaking the same language! There are at least 3 signs of communication confusion.  By Lavern Nissley
(Adapted from a presentation by Les and Leslie Parrott, well known relationship authors and educators) In our almost 41 years of marriage Ronda and I have become experts at conflict. Experts in failure, that is. But we continue to learn and gain insights into our own foibles and tendencies. You’ll get an inside look into a “prickly” we had just this past week! And a helpful tool that we recently added to our conflict resolution toolkit.  By Lavern Nissley
Ever thought about what you'll leave for the next generation? What you'll be honored for as your life winds down? We celebrated the 90th birthday of Ronda's mom this past weekend. Her father isn't far behind in age, turning 90 next August. Being together with Ronda's siblings in inlaws was inspirational and gave me a profound appreciation for the legacy these two people are leaving. |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. 
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