 By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach Coordinator “We’re just in a rut, I guess.” We can’t seem to find joy in each other’s presence. We feel tired and frustrated with one another. Hearing this explanation from a friend referring to her marriage made me think back to a time when my husband and I were in a similar place, a “joy gap” in our marriage. Then I started to wonder, how did we get there? How did we get out? How do we keep from getting there again?
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 September's theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faithfulness. Kermit Rowe, one of our Relationship Facilitators shares about the skills needed for a lasting marriage, that many times are in short supply.
Devotion and faithfulness seem to be in short supply in our culture these days. So, when you see these two qualities alive and well in a lasting marriage, you’ve got to wonder what that couple has that about 50 percent of the couples who enter into holy matrimony don’t.  By: Abby Glaser
Encompass Community Advocate When our Outreach Coordinator told me this month’s topic is devotion and faithfulness…my first thought was that I didn’t have anything to say on that topic! Which is ironic since I have been with my husband for 25 years now. I suppose I do know a thing or two! While the definition of devotion includes love and loyalty, which is what most think of when they hear that word, it also includes “enthusiasm!" That definitely got my brain thinking… when was the last time I expressed enthusiasm for my partner?  By: Joe Kowalski
Owner/CEO Empowered Community Services Most everyone can remember the panic, sudden jolt, and jarring pain of hitting the ground after their friend jumped off the teeter totter when we were kids. Or that time when you were in a hurry to get home with the groceries. You’re late, it’s raining, and instead of making three trips into the house with the groceries in the rain, you try to carry all 37 bags at one time, only to slip on the pavement sending a week’s worth of groceries all over the garage floor. What about this one? You are up against a deadline at work, going on 4 hours of sleep and you get a call at 5:30p from your spouse demanding “where are you?” With everything going on, you forgot to update your calendar with the kids’ recital that you are now going to miss. These lessons on gravity, imbalance, and regret are hard to forget. Unbalanced objects, whether they be playground equipment, people, or the expectations of others, will always fall. My wife and I have four children (3 high schoolers still at home,) a new grandson, 3 dogs, and I run my own small business. The demands on my time are many and balance becomes more and more difficult to maintain. By my own admission, I have a lot of work to do when it comes to balance in my life, but the following are a few pieces of advice I’ve come to cherish on this exceedingly difficult subject.  By Kermit Rowe
Encompass Relationship Facilitator If you are looking for objective, empirical evidence that physical fitness leads to marital happiness and endurance, you’ll be looking long and hard. There just isn’t much out there. But observation and personal experience offer plenty of evidence that it does. Focus On The Family, one of the preeminent marriage ministries of the 20th and 21st centuries, offers this in a recent article: “Exercise isn’t the answer to every marriage issue, but it will help you to bond on a new level and establish invaluable disciplines, such as perseverance and goal-setting, that can help combat marital fatigue.”  By Ronda Nissley
Encompass Co-director By now, you may have heard the term “quiet quitting” in relationship to employment. If you haven’t, this is when an employee decides to do “just enough to get by” – no extra effort, no striving for excellence, and no emotional buy-in to the mission and purpose of their employer. This is justified by our desire for work/life balance and the sense that we don’t owe our employer anything but to do the job we’ve been hired to do. Personally, I’m very curious how this will work long-term – for the employee as well as the employer. By Lavern Nissley
Executive Director of Encompass Connection Center Most of us go through at least four daily opportunities for connection with our partner and/or children. Dr. Linda Duncan found in her research that there are four times of the day when a few minutes of positive effort to connect can influence a positive or negative outcome for the day. Want to know when they occur?  By: Abby Glaser, Community Advocate January means many of us are feeling the pressure to set resolutions! We begin each year setting lofty, vague and often unattainable goals for ourselves that end up failing by the time the Superbowl airs! But what if we flipped the script and instead of setting goals for new things to do we set an anti-resolution: a commitment to stop doing something. You might be thinking that’s what you always do…
I’m gonna work out every day. I’m gonna write in my journal every day. I’m gonna stop smoking. But these are all new goals to achieve and can often turn from inspiring to overwhelming quickly. An anti-resolution is ultimately identifying the things that need to change in your life and stopping the behavior that no longer serves you. Here are a few to consider in 2022: 1. Stop saying ‘Yes’. If you find yourself regularly overwhelmed, overly busy and exhausted this may be one you need to practice. One rule that has helped me in this area is the reminder that every ‘yes’ I give is a ‘no’ to something else. So anytime I’m asked to do something I think through what thing I would be saying no to and weigh if it’s worth it. For example: if I’m asked to join a committee that meets weekly, I’m saying ‘no’ to a minimum of four dinners a month with my family. Sometimes the answer will still be yes but it’s a better-informed yes.  By Lavern Nissley
How do you respond when someone you’ve just met remembers your name and uses it multiple times in your first exchange? How is your impression of that person different from one who refers to you in more generic terms like friend, sister or bud? Is the effort and concentration required to learn people's names worth it?  By Lavern Nissley Dave Wilson and I were chatting briefly after a men's breakfast. He was telling me about how he doesn't know what to tell other men when they ask him the secrets of being married 40+ years. But he knows what husbands should NOT do! I asked him, "So, what are your top three things NOT to do? He very quickly listed them By the way, Dave and Cindi have been married 46 years. |
HostsDr. David Marine and Theresa Mabry are Co-Directors of Encompass since June 1, 2024. TOPICS
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Funding is provided by Clark County Job and Family Services, Charles L. Shor Foundation, Nehemiah Foundation, Springfield Foundation, Turner Foundation, and private donations and fees.
Program content is the sole responsibility of Encompass Connection Center and does not necessarily represent the views of the funders.
Encompass Connection Center services are provided to all eligible persons on a non-discriminatory basis. Encompass Connection Center complies with all applicable laws and regulations concerning discrimination does not discriminate on the basis of the potential participant's race, gender, gender orientation, age, disability or religion.
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Program content is the sole responsibility of Encompass Connection Center and does not necessarily represent the views of the funders.
Encompass Connection Center services are provided to all eligible persons on a non-discriminatory basis. Encompass Connection Center complies with all applicable laws and regulations concerning discrimination does not discriminate on the basis of the potential participant's race, gender, gender orientation, age, disability or religion.
Registered 501(c)(3). EIN: 37-1485217