By Ronda Nissley
Encompass Co-director By now, you may have heard the term “quiet quitting” in relationship to employment. If you haven’t, this is when an employee decides to do “just enough to get by” – no extra effort, no striving for excellence, and no emotional buy-in to the mission and purpose of their employer. This is justified by our desire for work/life balance and the sense that we don’t owe our employer anything but to do the job we’ve been hired to do. Personally, I’m very curious how this will work long-term – for the employee as well as the employer. By Lavern Nissley
Executive Director of Encompass Connection Center Most of us go through at least four daily opportunities for connection with our partner and/or children. Dr. Linda Duncan found in her research that there are four times of the day when a few minutes of positive effort to connect can influence a positive or negative outcome for the day. Want to know when they occur? By: Abby Glaser, Community Advocate January means many of us are feeling the pressure to set resolutions! We begin each year setting lofty, vague and often unattainable goals for ourselves that end up failing by the time the Superbowl airs! But what if we flipped the script and instead of setting goals for new things to do we set an anti-resolution: a commitment to stop doing something. You might be thinking that’s what you always do…
I’m gonna work out every day. I’m gonna write in my journal every day. I’m gonna stop smoking. But these are all new goals to achieve and can often turn from inspiring to overwhelming quickly. An anti-resolution is ultimately identifying the things that need to change in your life and stopping the behavior that no longer serves you. Here are a few to consider in 2022: 1. Stop saying ‘Yes’. If you find yourself regularly overwhelmed, overly busy and exhausted this may be one you need to practice. One rule that has helped me in this area is the reminder that every ‘yes’ I give is a ‘no’ to something else. So anytime I’m asked to do something I think through what thing I would be saying no to and weigh if it’s worth it. For example: if I’m asked to join a committee that meets weekly, I’m saying ‘no’ to a minimum of four dinners a month with my family. Sometimes the answer will still be yes but it’s a better-informed yes. By Lavern Nissley
How do you respond when someone you’ve just met remembers your name and uses it multiple times in your first exchange? How is your impression of that person different from one who refers to you in more generic terms like friend, sister or bud? Is the effort and concentration required to learn people's names worth it? By Lavern Nissley Dave Wilson and I were chatting briefly after a men's breakfast. He was telling me about how he doesn't know what to tell other men when they ask him the secrets of being married 40+ years. But he knows what husbands should NOT do! I asked him, "So, what are your top three things NOT to do? He very quickly listed them By the way, Dave and Cindi have been married 46 years. By Lavern Nissley
A precious 60 year marriage transitioned suddenly on Monday, January 7, 2019. Gary and Dottie Wade were married June 13, 1958, having met each other in junior high school. But on this fateful Monday morning Gary found the love of his life slumped over in a chair. By Lavern Nissley
When things are going sideways in a relationship it is easy to focus on negatives, with what's going wrong. Much like gravity, such a focus pulls us downward and decreases our hope for improvement or restoration. Is there a better way to approach relationship challenges? |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. TOPICS
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