 By Lavern Nissley In early October of 2020 as a client couple was wrapping up the final session in the RINGS course, the husband asked an intriguing question: "Do you have a RINGS quick reference guide to help us remember all of the skills and insights we've learned. We don't want to forget what we've just completed."
"What a great idea!" I responded. Since its launch in May, 2007, RINGS has been experienced by thousands of couples. And this was the first time such a request had ever been voiced. What could we develop for completing couples to post on their refrigerators or bathroom mirrors? What you'll see below is the final outcome - with much appreciation to Joe Candio for the initial idea.
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 By Lavern Nissley
(Danny Meyer is a former pastor and overseer in the Association of Vineyard Churches) If you are married, please stop and take 2 minutes to read some super marriage advice from a May 18, 2018 Facebook post by Danny Meyer, a personal friend and acquaintance. In this brief post he offers incredibly humble and transparent reflections on his 44 year marriage to Penny. No self-promoting heroism at all! Seriously . . . This. Is. Good. Stuff!  By Lavern Nissley
Whenever two or more people come together for any purpose, goal or objective, there is potential for things going horribly wrong or incredibly well, with plenty of intermediate options. Most of us have experienced both ends of this social emotionally laden continuum. What is it that influences one outcome or the other? Mathematician and relationship researcher John Gottman has developed 4 predictors of marriage failure and 4 predictors of marriage success based upon his observation of hundreds of couples. Want to know what they are?  By Lavern Nissley
That's right. Just stop talking. Not for good, but to give others a chance to talk and for you to learn. All of us, unless we're extremely shy and/or very un-talkative by nature, could do well by consciously condensing.  By Lavern Nissley
As we head into the holidays and spend time with families and friends, many will experience fond memories and heartfelt joy. Others will experience the opposite, becoming acutely reminded of relationship dysfunctions. Many of us experience some of each. So, how do you cope effectively in the middle of this seasonal insanity? Those emotional allergies and buttons have a physiological affect, don't they? Increased heart rate and breathing. Blood pressure pounding away at your skull. Stomach churning and knots forming. Help!!! What to do?  By Lavern and Ronda Nissley
Do you ever dread the upcoming week? It's Sunday afternoon/evening, and you feel a pit in your stomach because tomorrow . . . Well, it all starts again. And it's a long time til the next weekend! While certain events or tasks on our calendars may create apprehension, we can easily eliminate one major source of anxiety. Want to know what it is?  By Lavern Nissley
Includes excellent content by guest, Jeff Cook So, what do you think? Better to confront someone verbally in person or by writing? What is at stake with either? Let's hear some excellent reflections by Jeff Cook on this.  By Lavern Nissley
Recently I was asked the question: "So what piece of advice would you give to anyone across the board in any relationship? Is there something that fits for anyone in any relationship?" While I'm not usually one to propose "one size fits all" responses, here's how I answered the question.  Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash By Lavern Nissley
You've likely heard of the Bermuda Triangle, a region in the western Atlantic Ocean where a number of ships and aircraft have disappeared mysteriously. Not surprisingly, it's also called the Devil's Triangle. Less familiar to most people is the Dreaded Drama Triangle, a social model of human interaction, especially when conflict is involved. It's as ominous and scary as the Bermuda Triangle. Want to know why? |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. 
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