 Lavern with his Dad, David Nissley, June 21, 2020 Our posts during June will feature the themes of Fathers, Father's Day, Leaders/Leadership.
By Lavern Nissley Encompass Executive Director My Dad would have turned 90 tomorrow, June 8. Although much of my experience of him as a father included spillovers from his own unhealed and unresolved childhood (anger, anxiety, agitation), I still miss him and acknowledge positive takeaways from his life. He passed November 12, 2021 and is buried in Arcola, Illinois at the Sunnyside Mennonite Church cemetery. Mom was buried in the same plot earlier this year after her death March 6. Some of the content you'll see in this post is drawn from A Tribute to Our Dad that Ken, Karen, and I shared at his funeral. But his legacy and impact are anything but buried. In some quirky and interesting ways they live on both in and through me.
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 By: Hollie Kowalski
Outreach Coordinator Parenting a teenager is no small feat. We have four children, currently three teenagers. Nothing will send me to my knees in prayer quicker than my kids! Through the chaos, the conflict, the blessings, and the battles, I must keep reminding myself: God is in control. My husband Joe is a logical, levelheaded parent with much patience. I, on the other hand… well, I like to say I’m a very “passionate,” person, especially when it comes to my kids. Joe would interpret this as emotional and easily excitable, but also a “pro” when it comes to loving on, caring for, and guiding our children. Together, we make a pretty great team, but even the very best parents don’t always have the answers. So when we’ve been consistent, loving, patient, supportive, good role models (most of the time…) and we’ve “chosen our battles carefully,” where do we turn when one of our children comes to us with anger and insecurity that won’t subside, or when one of them just wants to give up due to the fear of imperfection, or there is an undeniable ache from a loss or a badly broken heart from “the one they thought they’d marry?”  By Ronda Nissley
Encompass Co-director There is no shortage of resources available to teach us how to parent each phase of childhood from infants and toddlers to tweens and teens. But the plethora of guidance slows to a trickle when it comes to navigating our relationship with our adult kids. At what point do we stop “parenting” – when they head off to college? When they move out of the house? Or maybe when they get married or have their first child. Our team at Encompass all agree that as our children transition into adulthood, our roles as parents do and should change.  By Lavern Nissley
Encompass Executive Director In April we are featuring posts about children and parenting. One of my all-time favorite public exchanges with two of my children, Josh and Kristen, was during a Father's Day message in 2003. It was an interview format where I asked them a series of "penetrating questions" related to parenting. Their responses may surprise you!  Falling for Fall with Family
By: Ronda Nissley, Co-Director of Encompass Connection Center I really enjoy the Fall season here in Ohio. There’s nothing quite like having front row seats to the changing and vibrant colors of the trees as the weather turns cooler. But there’s more. As I reflect on what I like about Fall, I came up with the following list: By: Hollie Kowalski, Encompass Outreach Coordinator
A day in the life of the Kowalskis: 7-8a drop kids off at school (two different schools) -38 min drive- 9a-2p work -35 min drive- 2:45p pick Josie up from school, -35 min drive- 3:30p pick Dom up from school, drop him at home; Josie change clothes -25 min drive- 5p drop Josie off at rowing (use carpool for pickup) -55 min drive- 7:30p Isaiah's soccer game -55 min drive- 9:30-10:45p Homework, showers, and finally... bedtime This is a fairly typical week night schedule for our family. It makes me cranky just planning it, but this is what families "do" now right? This is the new "normal." But how is this new normal affecting our families?  By Lavern Nissley
Encompass Executive Director My Dad and my son, Josh, both have the same birthdays on June 8 - 39 years apart. I always start thinking about this unique historical overlap as the month of June begins. This year Josh and Emily are expecting a son, but my Dad won't get to meet him as he passed last November. It got me thinking about my future great-grandchildren, hoping I get to meet at least a few. Likely our age gap would be 70-80 years. What would I want to give them that would enrich their lives? What life hacks could I offer them that would still be relevant in their generation? Here goes . . .  By: Abby Glaser, Community Advocate Can you feel it? The days are getting longer. The temperatures outside are getting warmer. Spring is in the air, and spring is the season for fresh starts. Even parents need a fresh start sometimes... Every time I sit down to write a blog post on parenting or begin teaching a parenting class I always feel the need to clarify that I’m not an expert. Most people already know this but you’d be surprised at how many think mother of five children equals expert! One of the interesting things about my current stage in life is that I now have two adult children living out of my house and three still at home. So I’m starting to hear from the older kids areas they feel I could have done better and I have the opportunity to make some of those changes now with the younger kids. While my big kids will often lament about how differently we parent their younger siblings, my response is always of course! Just like them, their dad and I are always growing and evolving and trying to do a little better than we did before. In some ways one of the gifts of having multiple children that span a ten-year age gap is that we get ongoing chances to pivot and do better. I often hear from parents in coaching that they feel stuck or in a rut with their kids, especially teenagers. I’d like to offer a few ways to pursue a fresh start!  By: Kermit Rowe, Encompass Relationship Facilitator Ahhh February- a month of ROMANCE! Each week in February we’ll be sharing about the seasons of romance in marriage. Last week we visited the pre-marital through honeymoon seasons. This week we’ll talk about romance while the children are at home. Next week will be for the empty nesters and finally we’ll finish with the golden years. Parent or romantic partner … which comes first? What is the most challenging time in a marriage? When the honeymoon is over. The trick of course is to be able to keep the honeymoon attitude alive. But no matter how romantic the two are, that comes to a screeching halt when the two who became one, turn around and become two again, and three, and four, and … well, you get the picture. There are a lot of challenging ‘hoods out there, but none more challenging than parenthood. My wife and I, and some of you I’m sure, have been there and done that. Our nest is empty, and we don’t mind at all (most of the time). But many of you homemakers are in the eye of the storm, and those winds can howl. As an Encompass relationship facilitator and pastor, I’m constantly seeing the shrapnel produced by kid-induced, divisive war on the home front. It is heartbreaking as it is home-wrecking!  By Encompass Outreach Group When you get married, you get your first experience of having in-laws with your partner’s parents. This can often be a time filled with frustration and complications. However, once you have children and they grow up, get married, and have families of their own, you suddenly become the mother-in-law or father-in-law that you once had to deal with. Here’s how to be a good in-law when your child has a family of their own:
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HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. TOPICS
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Program content is the sole responsibility of Encompass Connection Center and does not necessarily represent the views of the funders.
Encompass Connection Center services are provided to all eligible persons on a non-discriminatory basis. Encompass Connection Center complies with all applicable laws and regulations concerning discrimination does not discriminate on the basis of the potential participant's race, gender, gender orientation, age, disability or religion.
Registered 501(c)(3). EIN: 37-1485217