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Starting this month we'll be alternating blog posts and "our stories" videos on Tuesdays. Blog posts will appear on the 1st/3rd Tuesday and videos on the 2nd/4th Tuesdays. Everything we post here is under the umbrella of practical tips & insights for your relationships.
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 By Kermit Rowe
(Kermit is a relationship facilitator with Encompass) There’s no denying it … the holiday rush has kicked into high gear. Finishing the shopping and baking, the decoration hanging and last-second plan-making. Lots of “-ings” but not lots of time left to be “finish-ing” them. What’s a person to do? Or for the purposes of this post, what’s a couple to do? While checking our list twice, we do well to ask ourselves who should be at the top of that list.  By Lavern Nissley
After 12 years of providing RINGS (Real Intimacy and Growth Skills) for couples, we are rolling out a major update/upgrade. The overall look and structure has been refreshed. Want to take a sneak peek?  By Heidi Biswas
(Dave and Heidi are fairly new residents in Springfield, Ohio, with Dave joining our Encompass team in January, 2019 as Outreach Coordinator. You'll get an interesting and inspiring glimpse into their process of selecting wedding attire and atmosphere.) So we got married in our pajamas. It took me a little while to figure out that this was what I wanted. At the time of being engaged I didn’t know I had felt an expectation of how I was supposed to get married. The dress, the venue, the decorations, the guest list - I knew it wasn’t what I wanted, but that’s just how weddings are, and I felt some unspoken pressure that that was how it had to be, or I’d be letting people down. In preparation for the wedding, my sister and my mother would show me pictures of beautiful decorations and plates and dresses and ask which ones I liked best, but I remember not being able to answer very well.  By Lavern Nissley
I've never been a fan of the saying, "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy". Ronda and I have talked about it, and we both have found it somewhat derogatory and sexist. A 14 year research study in the UK took a look at this hypothesis and came up with some pretty interesting results. And some compelling implications.  By Lavern Nissley Dave Wilson and I were chatting briefly after a men's breakfast. He was telling me about how he doesn't know what to tell other men when they ask him the secrets of being married 40+ years. But he knows what husbands should NOT do! I asked him, "So, what are your top three things NOT to do? He very quickly listed them By the way, Dave and Cindi have been married 46 years.  By Lavern Nissley
(This post is birthed out of a challenging, life-altering experience affecting Lavern & Ronda Nissley, Encompass co-directors.) Ronda was feeling some abdominal discomfort the Friday before Father’s Day, similar to an episode she had experienced earlier with diverticulitis. What worked before was antibiotics. So when she went to Urgent Care on Father’s Day and was sent to the ER for a CAT scan, she was still thinking, “I just need some antibiotics.” I joined Ronda in the ER after receiving her text that she had been sent there. We were not prepared for the results of the CAT scan.  By Lavern Nissley
(Danny Meyer is a former pastor and overseer in the Association of Vineyard Churches) If you are married, please stop and take 2 minutes to read some super marriage advice from a May 18, 2018 Facebook post by Danny Meyer, a personal friend and acquaintance. In this brief post he offers incredibly humble and transparent reflections on his 44 year marriage to Penny. No self-promoting heroism at all! Seriously . . . This. Is. Good. Stuff!  By Ellen Dudney
(Ellen served with the Pregnancy Resource Clinic in Springfield from 2008 through 2018, beginning as a Nurse Manager, then leading as Executive Director from 2011-2018.) Yes, Virginia, there is life after the working! I do not like the word “retirement”. It focuses on things ending, but it says nothing about the future. And, it makes me sound old – which I most certainly am not! How about if we call it “transition” instead. After all, I’m still the same person, with the same skills, interests, and passions – I’ll just be pursuing these in a different way, as will you.  By Lavern Nissley
If I were to tell you that there is a simple, 5 minute daily habit that has been shown to increase the chances of marriage success to over 99%, would you want to know what it is? Would you be interested in trying it out? Ronda and I came across this secret during a marriage workshop in March, 1990. It changed the trajectory of our own marriage, likely saving it. And we love to share this potent secret with others. |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. 
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