September's theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faithfulness. Kermit Rowe, one of our Relationship Facilitators shares about the skills needed for a lasting marriage, that many times are in short supply.
Devotion and faithfulness seem to be in short supply in our culture these days. So, when you see these two qualities alive and well in a lasting marriage, you’ve got to wonder what that couple has that about 50 percent of the couples who enter into holy matrimony don’t.
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By: Abby Glaser
Encompass Community Advocate When our Outreach Coordinator told me this month’s topic is devotion and faithfulness…my first thought was that I didn’t have anything to say on that topic! Which is ironic since I have been with my husband for 25 years now. I suppose I do know a thing or two! While the definition of devotion includes love and loyalty, which is what most think of when they hear that word, it also includes “enthusiasm!" That definitely got my brain thinking… when was the last time I expressed enthusiasm for my partner? By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach & Event Coordinator There is a reason the phrase “for richer or poorer” is included in the marriage vows. Money is the second leading cause of divorce (behind infidelity.) Regardless of how much you love your spouse, money can be a major source of frustration and contention in a relationship… especially when you love to shop and OH, HOW I LOVE TO SHOP! I love it even more when there is a good deal to be had! I mean who can resist a “like new” accent chair in the exact color of the living room for HALF the original price? (Not me.) My dopamine receptors go crazy when I click that Marketplace tab and find aaaall the things! My easy-going husband is so good to me. He loves to hear excitement in my voice. So, when I start to talk about all the great deals I’ve found during the week on Marketplace, it’s cute and makes him giggle… until it doesn’t. When it’s time to get serious about saving money, I steer clear of the Marketplace tab. Here are a few suggestions that you might find helpful as I have, when I am trying to save money: By Kermit Rowe Encompass Relationship Facilitator More than half my life was spent as a sports journalist, a life that is now in the rearview mirror. But I continue to see valuable corollaries between the games of the sports world and the game of life. In my last four years as an Encompass Connection Center relationship coach, the similarities are even more glaring – especially in realm of committed couple relationships. After infidelity almost destroyed their marriage, Gary and Andrea Keener share why their giving to a cause for healthy marriages is an overflow of their own healing.
We're so grateful for and to this faithful couple. They embody the Encompass vision of Family trees forever changed. Their testimonial video below is inspiring and encouraging. By Lavern Nissley
Encompass Executive Director (Our March blog posts are featuring elements related to preparation. Thanks to Jerrod and Ashley Evans for sharing how they have been prepared through an Encompass resource.) This past Monday I received an "out-of-the-blue" email from a couple who had taken the RINGS course and coaching two years ago. They are approaching their 15th anniversary, and their sense of confidence for their marriage to go the distance has greatly increased. I'd love to have them speak for themselves on the impact, particularly of how the tools and skills acquired in RINGS are affecting them two years later. By Kermit Rowe
Encompass Relationship Facilitator It really doesn’t make sense, does it? Couples will spend $10,000+ and a year or more planning their wedding but spend nothing to prepare for their marriage. This could be a dangerous and potentially destructive oversight. For this reason, from the start of our organization (in 2005) we asked local pastors to sign a pledge that they would not marry a couple unless they had premarital counseling or coaching. We, and many area pastors as it turns out, feel it is THAT important! So, as we dive deep into our theme of preparation for this month, looking at the advantages of premarital counseling and coaching is as natural for us as it is foundational. By: Abby Glaser
Encompass Community Advocate Spring is a time for new birth and new growth…and at the Encompass office it’s a time when we start getting calls from engaged couples preparing for their weddings! After fielding one of those calls recently I found myself thinking about what things I wish I would have been told before getting married. There were many misconceptions my husband and I had that we quickly found out were wrong! After 25 years together, I can confidently debunk the following ones! By: Ronda Nissley,
Co-Director of Encompass Connection Center There are few things I find more annoying than a stoplight that turns red just as I am approaching the intersection. It’s personal – the green light sees me coming, quickly turns yellow and then red – forcing me to come to a complete stop! Several months ago, as Lavern and I were hurrying across town to make it to our next meeting, I couldn’t help but notice that we were literally hitting EVERY SINGLE RED light!! I could feel the exasperation and tension rising inside of me and was getting ready to express that frustration when Lavern joyfully announces, “Have you noticed we have been first at every red light?” Incredulous, I told him I noticed we were getting stopped by every red light, but I certainly didn’t see that as a good thing! He responded by saying how much he enjoyed being “first in line” so he could take off unimpeded when the light turned green. By Kermit Rowe
Encompass Relationship Facilitator The attitude of gratitude is powerful in any relationship, but especially so in marriage. As powerful as it can be, it can also be just as challenging. Our spouse is someone we’ve committed the rest of our life to, who probably knows us better than any other human being. They are reminded daily that we are not perfect, and we make mistakes. There are going to be times when we will give each other reasons not to be thankful, mainly because we do this life together. Here are some ways to overcome the challenge of taking the best thing to ever happen to us for granted... |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. TOPICS
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