By Lavern Nissley
Encompass Executive Director (Our March blog posts are featuring elements related to preparation. Thanks to Jerrod and Ashley Evans for sharing how they have been prepared through an Encompass resource.) This past Monday I received an "out-of-the-blue" email from a couple who had taken the RINGS course and coaching two years ago. They are approaching their 15th anniversary, and their sense of confidence for their marriage to go the distance has greatly increased. I'd love to have them speak for themselves on the impact, particularly of how the tools and skills acquired in RINGS are affecting them two years later.
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By Lavern Nissley
Encompass Executive Director Darnell and Bekah came to walk through the RINGS Experience education and coaching, having been married for 12 1/2 years and being parents of 4 active young boys. Their online relationship assessment was average with some areas like connection, intimacy, stress responses, and conflict resolution way below average and needing significant skill-building. Their weekly preparation, or "homework", and then meeting with a certified coach helped them grow in understanding their relationship deficits, but more importantly, to learn skills and tools to enhance their sense of "US". One skill, the RINGS Chat, made quite a difference as they began doing it daily to share feelings, intentions/information, needs, gratitude, and dreams for the future." This is what I have so been so hungry for," she remarked the week after learning the RINGS Chat. "We feel as close as we have ever felt after 12 years of marriage." And Darnell is meeting her love languages of gifts and affirmation with little notes all over the house. And the boys are seeing the notes and getting in on the excitement. Responding to the RINGS Experience final evaluation, Bekah commented about the personal impact: "I want to experience life to the fullest with my husband now and to try new things with him. I feel like I have grown so much as an individual through this experience." Darnell commented about the SOS conflict resolution tool: "We both need a tool to be able to share our feelings in a safe and productive way and this has provided that."In their final session, both observed that as they reviewed major stressors in their lives, "For the first time in many, many years our marriage relationship was not on the list!" At Encompass we celebrate the wonderful transformation experienced by this couple and that their "family tree has been forever changed." If you’re looking for guidance and growth in your relationship or parenting abilities, get in touch with a knowledgeable and sincere advocate or coach at Encompass Connection center by following the links below. Introduction by Lavern Nissley Encompass Executive Director The brief video we're featuring answers the question, "How do you know when it's time to seek help in your marriage?" Not every couple reaching out to us is on the brink - some just want to grow in their skills. But Kevin and Renee were giving it one final attempt. Their heartfelt reflections are an encouragement to all couples who can identify with them. Encompass Connection Center helps couples learn how to create fulfilling, productive relationships for years to come. We offer a free relationship assessment to determine your relationship’s strengths and potential threats. For additional help, look into our RINGS Experience, which includes marriage strengthening exercises and a coaching model to help build real intimacy and growth skills. We'll also help you to break those destructive patterns that may negatively impact generations. Video featuring Drew and Sarah Brown
RINGS Experience course and coaching participants Drew and Sarah have full lives with 6 young children. They face the daily challenge of making quality time for each other. While going through the RINGS Experience course they acquired a valuable connection tool, the RINGS Chat. But implementing it into their busy schedule was tough. And tiring. But they adapted and adjusted to make it work given their context. The result: A potent legacy of a healthy marriage to pass along to each of their six children. Watch their story in a 3 minute video. Ahhhh, February- a month of ROMANCE. Each week in February we're discussing the seasons of romance in marriage. After visiting the pre-marital, honeymoon, "with kids at home," and empty nest seasons, this week we're ready to find out what happens romantically in the golden years. By Lavern Nissley
Executive director of Encompass Connection Center This may come as a surprise, but it IS possible to experience romance in marriage after age 60. It's certainly different from romance in the early years of marriage where it doesn't take much for things to get hot and steamy. Perhaps a metaphor would be appropriate. Young married romance is like a microwave, while senior adult married romance is more like a crockpot. Both can bring about tasty edibles, but the latter is a more deliberate, extended process. It's the latter of these two metaphors we want to dive into. How can you keep love alive after decades together as a couple and as your physical energy and health levels decline? Are there ways to grow in body/soul/spirit attractiveness as we age? ![]() Each week in November we'll be sharing stories from grateful couples who have seen their family trees forever changed through growing in relationship skills. This week we hear from Daniel & Sarah, participants in the RINGS Experience course for couples.
By Lavern & Ronda Nissley A traumatic pair of recent falls from our tandem recumbent bicycle made us think seriously about our tandem biking future. We hadn’t fallen in about 9 years, and within a week we fell twice. The second fall shook us and actually raised the question on whether we should just stop riding tandem altogether. Kind of like divorcing our bike!
By Encompass Outreach Group Mothers play a significant role in our lives in many different ways, from giving us life, to caring for and protecting us, to teaching us about the world. As babies, the bond with our mothers is the first and deepest bond of our lives. How our mothers raised us is tied in directly to our formation, our self-awareness, and how we view the world. Another way the role of our mother impacts our lives is through our romantic relationships. Here’s how:
By Encompass Outreach Group When couples need relationship help, the most common reaction is to seek out a marriage counselor. Marriage counselors have become the go-to source for dealing with issues within a marriage, but there is another alternative for couples looking to get relationship help: marriage coaching. We’re here to discuss what marriage coaching is and explain how it differs from marriage counseling.
By Lavern Nissley In early October of 2020 as a client couple was wrapping up the final session in the RINGS course, the husband asked an intriguing question: "Do you have a RINGS quick reference guide to help us remember all of the skills and insights we've learned. We don't want to forget what we've just completed."
"What a great idea!" I responded. Since its launch in May, 2007, RINGS has been experienced by thousands of couples. And this was the first time such a request had ever been voiced. What could we develop for completing couples to post on their refrigerators or bathroom mirrors? What you'll see below is the final outcome - with much appreciation to Joe Candio for the initial idea. |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. TOPICS
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