By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach Coordinator “We’re just in a rut, I guess.” We can’t seem to find joy in each other’s presence. We feel tired and frustrated with one another. Hearing this explanation from a friend referring to her marriage made me think back to a time when my husband and I were in a similar place, a “joy gap” in our marriage. Then I started to wonder, how did we get there? How did we get out? How do we keep from getting there again?
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By Kermit Rowe
Encompass Relationship Facilitator I’ve pastored for 18 years here in Springfield and ministered to couples as part of the Encompass Connection Center ministry for the past five. I’ve seen and witnessed the best and worst of intentions, passion that is both inspiring and misdirected, and communication that ranged from respectful to downright rude. I’ve seen hundreds of couples come through our doors in my time here, and thousands have come to us for help. And I’ve noticed they fall into three major categories... Our blog posts this month are based on the phrase "Start HERE." They will all have relational components, but by the limiting parameter of something with utmost priority.
By Lavern Nissley Encompass Executive Director Ronda and I have found a new recreational/exercise love. If you know us from previous statements made on this topic, you'll recall we love bicycling, hiking, cross country skiing, and playing racquetball. Any guesses on what our new love is? Our blog posts theme for December surrounds "special Christmas memories/stories." Certainly, the holiday season has plenty of opportunities to describe as "thriving" or "strifing" in relationships. What memories or stories are uplifting and help family trees to be forever changed?
By Lavern Nissley Encompass Executive Director I was scrolling through my iPhone photos looking for Christmas memory ideas. Wow! So many flooded my heart and mind. But when I condensed them down to several common themes that were fulfilling and significant, it became very clear what we value as a family. My heart is warmed as I reflect on them! By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach Coordinator Oh, how I love this boy. My son Dominik has his mother’s…well, everything. He is the most like me out of my four kids. The poor kid got my need for control, independence, my stubbornness, sensitivity, and poor math skills. But he also got my big heart, my passionate, charismatic personality, my drive, determination, and eyes that tend to see the best in people. The two of us stick together like glue…until we don’t. Due to our passionate and sensitive nature, if we don’t agree on an issue, our home becomes a battleground and unfortunately the innocent bystanders, known as our family, get drawn into battle as well. September's theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faithfulness. Kermit Rowe, one of our Relationship Facilitators shares about the skills needed for a lasting marriage, that many times are in short supply.
Devotion and faithfulness seem to be in short supply in our culture these days. So, when you see these two qualities alive and well in a lasting marriage, you’ve got to wonder what that couple has that about 50 percent of the couples who enter into holy matrimony don’t. By: Abby Glaser
Encompass Community Advocate When our Outreach Coordinator told me this month’s topic is devotion and faithfulness…my first thought was that I didn’t have anything to say on that topic! Which is ironic since I have been with my husband for 25 years now. I suppose I do know a thing or two! While the definition of devotion includes love and loyalty, which is what most think of when they hear that word, it also includes “enthusiasm!" That definitely got my brain thinking… when was the last time I expressed enthusiasm for my partner? By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach Coordinator We spend 70-80% of our day engaged in some form of communication. 55% of that time is generally devoted to listening. The average person who has not worked to develop good listening skills will only remember about half of any recent conversation. 48 hours after the conversation, they are likely to only remember 25% or less… and then there’s me. My “working mom brain” has so many “open tabs” at any given time, I consider it a win if I remember my own children’s names on a daily basis. Because of the “coordinated chaos” in my head sometimes, I tend to “drift” when conversing with my husband-especially in the evening after a long day. We don’t have much time together during the week and I always want him to feel that he is important, that I value his thoughts and emotions. So… By Kermit Rowe Encompass Relationship Facilitator More than half my life was spent as a sports journalist, a life that is now in the rearview mirror. But I continue to see valuable corollaries between the games of the sports world and the game of life. In my last four years as an Encompass Connection Center relationship coach, the similarities are even more glaring – especially in realm of committed couple relationships. By Kermit Rowe
Encompass Relationship Facilitator If you are looking for objective, empirical evidence that physical fitness leads to marital happiness and endurance, you’ll be looking long and hard. There just isn’t much out there. But observation and personal experience offer plenty of evidence that it does. Focus On The Family, one of the preeminent marriage ministries of the 20th and 21st centuries, offers this in a recent article: “Exercise isn’t the answer to every marriage issue, but it will help you to bond on a new level and establish invaluable disciplines, such as perseverance and goal-setting, that can help combat marital fatigue.” |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. TOPICS
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