​By Lavern Nissley

A number of years ago Ronda and I were in a mentoring session with a couple married for 20 years. They were "prickly" - a term we've come to use for very stressed couples. The puzzle was that they had taken all kinds of marriage classes, attended retreats and read the latest books on marriage. But it wasn't evident at all!

In one session they said something profound. "We know what our problem is. It's actually 3 things." When they said what the 3 things were, we both thought, "Yep! You certainly do seem to have these 3."

By Lavern Nissley
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Whenever two or more people come together for any purpose, goal or objective, there is potential for things going horribly wrong or incredibly well, with plenty of intermediate options. Most of us have experienced both ends of this social emotionally laden continuum. What is it that influences one outcome or the other?

Mathematician and relationship researcher John Gottman has developed 4 predictors of marriage failure and 4 predictors of marriage success based upon his observation of hundreds of couples. Want to know what they are?

By Abby Glaser

I was listening to a podcast recently where the guest shared something called the “10-7-5 Rule”. The gist of it is that each person has ten defining moments, seven critical choices and five pivotal people who impact who they are.

Defining moments, both positive and negative, are events who have changed or redefined who we are. Many of those are situations out of our control and our response to them is what changes us. Critical choices, also positive or negative, have affected our life up until today and set the path for our future.
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Lastly, five pivotal people are individuals who have made an indelible mark on our lives. That latter category has had me thinking the most.

By Lavern Nissley

​One of Ronda's goals for 2019 is to become more minimalistic. What that 5 syllable word means is that she is "on a mission" to do a lot of household item purging so that clutter is reduced and only the essentials are available to us. Scary. I wasn't sure how this was going to turn out.

Just under two months into this crusade for simplicity, I don't want to go back. It's had an amazing effect upon us!

By Jeremy Hudson, guest blogger
Jeremy is campus pastor of Fellowship Spring Hill in Springfield OH and CEO/Founder/Owner at Red Chair Leadership

“Jeremy, asking questions makes you look smart!”

I can hear those words ringing in my ears like they were said yesterday, not the twenty years ago when my dad said them to me.

He was gently yet firmly challenging a blindspot that was cropping up in my leadership abilities. I was under the impression that to be the leader on a team or in an organization meant you had knew better than everyone else what needed to be done and how. At that point in my youth, I was carrying myself like I was the smartest guy in any room I walked into. When presented with a problem, the absolute worst thing I could imagine saying in response was “I don’t know.” So, instead of digging into and learning about what was going on, I would make something up. Even if it was wrong. Because leaders are supposed to know things. After all, that was why you are the leader, right?​