 By Lavern Nissley
Dave King, a friend and colleague from 30 years ago in Cincinnati, died at age 55 last week. The text notification from another friend hit me hard. "No, no, no!" I had just been thinking of calling him and getting together. But he had collapsed while working out and couldn't be revived. Several of us who worked together with Dave in the 1980's at New Beginnings Fellowship, a small suburban church in Finneytown/Cincinnati, attended his funeral Saturday. What a surreal experience to see such a close friend laying in a casket! But there was unexpected inspiration in this funeral from Dave's two children, Matthew and Erin.
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 By Lavern Nissley
I've never been a fan of the saying, "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy". Ronda and I have talked about it, and we both have found it somewhat derogatory and sexist. A 14 year research study in the UK took a look at this hypothesis and came up with some pretty interesting results. And some compelling implications.  By Lavern Nissley Dave Wilson and I were chatting briefly after a men's breakfast. He was telling me about how he doesn't know what to tell other men when they ask him the secrets of being married 40+ years. But he knows what husbands should NOT do! I asked him, "So, what are your top three things NOT to do? He very quickly listed them By the way, Dave and Cindi have been married 46 years.  By Lavern Nissley
(Photo: Cara Owsley/The Enquirer) Ronda and I have followed the heartbreaking story of Brooke Skylar Richardson, the young teen from Warren County who secretly gave birth to her baby in the middle of the night, then allegedly killed it (she claims it was stillborn) and buried the newborn in the back yard. Last week she was acquitted on 3 counts of aggravated murder, involuntary manslaughter and child endangering. She was convicted of abuse of a corpse and sentenced to three years of community control and seven days in jail. Did any good come out of this horrendous story? Or was it pretty much all terrible?  By Kermit Rowe
(Kermit is a relationship facilitator and pastoral counselor with us at Encompass, providing coaching in Relationship Skills and Parenting for Kid's Sake.) There's a powerful song that has been making its way up the contemporary Christian charts recently called "Fear Is A Liar," by Zach Williams. In my experience as a pastor, counselor, husband, father, brother, friend ... son of God ... I have both seen and personally experienced the negative truth of those four little words. We also know that many times what we fear turns out to be nothing. I came across a post on Huffington Post recently that exposed just how often we buy into that deception.  By Lavern Nissley
Ronda got the results of her 23andMe DNA Genetic Testing & Analysis last week. I was quite amused at the text she sent me indicating a genetic trait she apparently has calledmisophonia. It refers to something she is predisposed to disliking intensely. Definitely NOT a surprise to either of us! In fact, she has communicated this intense dislike to me at least a dozen times in our 40 years of marriage. And I always thought that she was over-reacting. Until now. From here on everything changes!  By Lavern Nissley
When I typed the title of this blog post a few seconds ago, my computer put a red line under the word "phub". Meaning it's not a word it recognizes. Until last week I had never heard of it either. By the time you've read through this post you'll know it's definition as well as how not to do it.  Credit to Mary Ann Shillinger, Pinterest pin By Lavern Nissley
Before Abraham Lincoln became President in 1861 he gave a memorable speech that came to be known as "House Divided". It was essentially a no compromise speech attacking the possibility of a half slave, half free United States. "A house divided against itself cannot stand", Lincoln proclaimed as he quoted Jesus' words centuries earlier. In the aftermath of two horrible mass shootings in El Paso and Dayton polarization and escalation have increased between left and right. I wonder what President Lincoln would say about today's political landscape. Certainly there are issues that divide Americans at a level that slavery did in the 1800's. (See optional extra reading at end of blog for more texture on this.)  By Lavern Nissley
I watched a hush fall over the waiting area of the License Bureau as an elderly couple slowly crossed the huge distance from the door to the clerk. Holding each other for stability, him with a red-tipped cane, her with a handful of documents, both with eyes forward, they seemed to reflect decades of memories. A picture of lasting commitment. Who was this couple? And why did they attract the attention of all in the room?  By Lavern Nissley
We launched this weekly blog exactly a year ago in order to make available "mini bites" of relationship tips and insights to interested readers and followers. Most posts have gone live on Tuesday mornings around 10 am. To date we've generated 70 topic tags for the 52 posts. And about 18,000 views. It seemed like a good time to pause and listen to your thoughts. Nothing extensive, just 3 simple questions that you can respond to in the survey below in about a minute. |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. 
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