 By Lavern Nissley
The "Send her back" chant that erupted at President Trump's rally in North Carolina last week touched nerves everywhere. It singled out a congresswoman from Minnesota, an immigrant from Somalia and US citizen. Her views have been particularly troubling to conservatives as well as to some colleagues in her own party. The ping pong match of acerbic tweets and public comments between Trump and "The Squad" of four congresswomen (close allies of the chant target) seemed to boil over into newscasts, social media discussions and private conversations. Maybe that's why we had such hot weather in most of the USA last week? What can we learn from such intense political polarization and flame-throwing that could help us in our couple, family and organizational relationships?
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 By Lavern Nissley
A close acquaintance of mine has lived a life of anger. I can’t remember many interactions with him when he wasn’t angry about something. Occasionally, I’ve been the target of his anger. Needless to say, it’s not enjoyable being around people who are perpetually peeved! But what to do?  By Lavern Nissley
A number of years ago Ronda and I were in a mentoring session with a couple married for 20 years. They were "prickly" - a term we've come to use for very stressed couples. The puzzle was that they had taken all kinds of marriage classes, attended retreats and read the latest books on marriage. But it wasn't evident at all! In one session they said something profound. "We know what our problem is. It's actually 3 things." When they said what the 3 things were, we both thought, "Yep! You certainly do seem to have these 3."  By Lavern Nissley
If you have children, or are planning to have children, what would you say is your one word job description as a parent? It could fit into the blank in this sentence: "I believe my parenting job description is to __________."  By Lavern and Ronda Nissley
(This post is a follow up to Father's Day surprise from last week about a life-altering experience that almost took Ronda's life. If you aren't familiar with this back story, you'll want to read it first.) Robert Emmons, a leading researcher on gratitude, had this to say about it in a 2010 Greater Good Magazine post : "Gratitude is a social emotion. I see it as a relationship-strengthening emotion because it requires us to see how we’ve been supported and affirmed by other people." He also provided 4 reasons on why gratitude is good. We'd like to share those 4 reasons as well as our own 7 points of gratitude surrounding a major challenge in our own marriage journey.  By Lavern Nissley
(This post is birthed out of a challenging, life-altering experience affecting Lavern & Ronda Nissley, Encompass co-directors.) Ronda was feeling some abdominal discomfort the Friday before Father’s Day, similar to an episode she had experienced earlier with diverticulitis. What worked before was antibiotics. So when she went to Urgent Care on Father’s Day and was sent to the ER for a CAT scan, she was still thinking, “I just need some antibiotics.” I joined Ronda in the ER after receiving her text that she had been sent there. We were not prepared for the results of the CAT scan.  By Ronda Nissley
Ronda is co-director with her husband, Lavern, at Encompass Connection Center. Her educational and vocational background is in long term care administration, having served as administrator of several facilities before stepping away to work together with Lavern in 2005. Your mom or your marriage? Which would you choose? You may have a quick, easy answer; however, as aging parents cycle through predictable stages of decline and dependency, it's not always clear where the priorities will land.  By Lavern Nissley
“They are not sleeping. They are not going to school. They are dropping out of social activities. A lot of kids have stopped playing sports so they can do this.” “We have one kid who destroyed the family car because he thought his parents had locked his device inside. He took a hammer to the windshield.” Ugh! What is the this?  By Lavern Nissley
The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman have been a cherished resource and wake up call for thousands of couples around the world. If you own a smart phone, there is now a fun, innovative way to take the Five Love Languages into a new frontier. Want to know more? Get ready to download a cool new free app.  By Lavern Nissley
(Danny Meyer is a former pastor and overseer in the Association of Vineyard Churches) If you are married, please stop and take 2 minutes to read some super marriage advice from a May 18, 2018 Facebook post by Danny Meyer, a personal friend and acquaintance. In this brief post he offers incredibly humble and transparent reflections on his 44 year marriage to Penny. No self-promoting heroism at all! Seriously . . . This. Is. Good. Stuff! |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. 
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