Encompass Connection Center
  • Home
  • About ECC
  • For Couples
    • Free Relationship Assessments
    • The RINGS Experience
  • For Families
    • Free Parenting Assessment
    • Parenting for Kid's Sake
    • The REACH Experience
  • Donate
  • Get in touch
  • BLOG
PRACTICAL TIPS & INSIGHTS FOR YOUR

RELATIONSHIPS

How not to "phub" your partner

8/20/2019

 
Picture
By Lavern Nissley

When I typed the title of this blog post a few seconds ago, my computer put a red line under the word "phub". Meaning it's not a word it recognizes. Until last week I had never heard of it either.

By the time you've read through this post you'll know it's definition as well as how not to do it.
So in 2012 a group began an anti-phubbing movement. Phubbing (are you ready for the definition?) = "snubbing" + "phone", or snubbing your partner with your phone.

In Rob Wile's 10/2/15 post entitled 'Phubbing' is ruining American relationships he cited a survey of more the 400 individuals by Baylor University where "46.3% of respondents said their partners snubbed them by taking to their phone, or 'phubbed' them. And 22.6% said it 'caused issues' in their relationship."

I love the list Ashley Willis included in her 7/1/19 post: Social Media and Marriage: How to Keep It From Killing Your Marriage.
  1. Put your cellphones in a specific place at a particular time each night so that you can give your spouse and family your full focus.
  2. Do your best to not be on a phone call or texting when you get home from work so that you can greet your spouse and kids with a smile and your best attention.
  3. Share all your passwords with your spouse so that there are no secret interactions or accounts that your spouse isn’t aware of.
  4. Don’t go searching for “old flames” on your social media, and don’t send them messages or respond to their posts. No good will come from this, and it will damage your spouse’s trust in you.
  5. Install filtering software on all your devices (smartphones, laptops, e-readers, iPads, etc.) to block inappropriate websites and to monitor how much time you spend on your devices and different websites. You can even set time limits as well. A great site/app for this that we often recommend is called Qustodio.
  6. Don’t bring your phone to the dinner table, and don’t have it on the table during a date night. If you receive a call/text, ignore it and check it later when your family dinner or date is over.

It just struck me that the word "phub" is very close in pronunciation to the words "fib" and "flub". Both have negative connotations including dishonesty and failure, NOT good ingredients for healthy relationships.

Join us in prioritizing relationships above our phones/social media. #PhubFreeZone
Lisa M Garvin
8/20/2019 10:13:35 am

This is great advice since I just recently joined FB, though I must say, Keith doesn’t seem to mind as it keeps me from talking to him when he’s trying to watch Fox News! 😄

Lavern
8/20/2019 10:40:38 am

Haha, Lisa! Nice arrangement. I take it Keith isn’t feeling phubbed!

Chelsea
8/20/2019 10:49:34 am

This is great advise: We live in a time where all human communication seem very non existent . Being reminded that you should put your phone down is needed! We lose the feeling of human contact which is much needed for growth and success in any relationship! Great share

Lavern Nissley
8/20/2019 07:18:48 pm

Well said, Chelsea!

Truman Harris
8/25/2019 04:11:45 pm

Great advice!


Comments are closed.

    Subscribe

    * indicates required
    Picture

    Hosts

    Lavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships.

    TOPICS

    All
    5 Love Languages
    Abuse
    ACE Score
    Achievement
    Aging
    Amygdala Hijack
    Anger
    Any Relationship
    Apologizing
    Asking Great Questions
    Attention
    Bids
    Busy Calendar
    Change
    Children
    Christmas
    Coaching
    Commitment
    Communication
    Competition
    Conflict
    Confronting
    Connection
    Consequences
    Counseling
    Couples
    COVID
    Date Night
    Death
    Deposits
    Emotions
    Empathy
    Especially For Couples
    Especially For Families
    Especially For Organizations
    Exercise
    Expectations
    Falling
    Family Business
    Family Trees
    Fear
    Finances
    Forgiveness
    Fun
    Generational Trends
    Genetics
    Getting Along
    Getting Things Done
    Giving
    Grandchildren
    Gratitude
    Grief
    Grieving
    Healthy Eating
    Healthy Lifestyle
    Holidays
    Humility
    Humor
    Illness
    Infidelity
    In Laws
    In-Laws
    Insomnia
    Intimacy
    Leadership
    Learning
    Legacy
    Listening
    Long Distance
    Loss
    Love
    Love Defined
    Marriage
    Minimalizing
    Morale
    Offenses
    Office Culture
    Our Stories
    Outcome Orientation
    Parenting
    Peace
    Planning
    Polarization
    Praying Together
    Proactivity
    Problem Orientation
    Productivity
    Research
    Restoration
    Retirement
    RINGS Chat
    RINGS Experience
    Romance
    Romantic Attraction
    Satisfaction
    Schedule
    Screen Use
    Siblings
    Sleeping
    Smartphones
    Stress
    Success
    Suicide
    Surprises
    Survey
    Talking
    Teamwork
    Teens
    Timeouts
    Traits
    Transformation
    Understanding
    Valentine's Day
    Virtual Relationships
    Wedding
    Withdrawals
    Working Out

    Archives

    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018

Picture

FIND IT QUICKLY

Refer A CLIENT
SHOP RINGS PROGRAM
bring rings to my area

STAY CONNECTED

OFFICE HOURS

MON 9a-2p
TUE 9a-2p
WED 9a-2p
THU 9a-2p
​Other hours by appointment
call us

VISIT US

616 N. Limestone St. | Springfield, OH
Funding is provided by Clark County Job and Family Services, The Turner Foundation, Springfield Foundation, Buckeye Health, private donations and fees.
​Program content is the sole responsibility of Encompass Connection Center and does not necessarily represent the views of the funders.
Encompass Connection Center services are provided to all eligible persons on a non-discriminatory basis. Encompass Connection Center complies with all applicable laws and regulations concerning discrimination does not discriminate on the basis of the potential participant's race, gender, gender orientation, age, disability or religion.

​Registered 501(c)(3). EIN: 37-1485217
  • Home
  • About ECC
  • For Couples
    • Free Relationship Assessments
    • The RINGS Experience
  • For Families
    • Free Parenting Assessment
    • Parenting for Kid's Sake
    • The REACH Experience
  • Donate
  • Get in touch
  • BLOG