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Beyond "How was your day?"

8/25/2020

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By Lavern Nissley

One of the ruts couples and families can run into is asking the same questions of each other, well-meaning as they may be. Rut question. Rut answer. "Fine."

A recent blog post I read by Ann Malmberg from PREPARE/ENRICH had a title that caught my attention. "5 Questions to Replace 'How was your day?'" You'll see several in a minute, but the post got me thinking of a list of other questions that are a bit out of the ordinary.
​The 3 questions I liked best from Ann Malberg's list were the following:
  • What gave you a sense of accomplishment today?
  • How would you like today to end?
  • What did you learn today?
I was struck by the fact that they are all narrower in scope than "How was your day?" But not so narrow and deep that I might actually resent being asked to use my brain at the end of the day!

Here are several more that I think could fit:
  • If it were possible, what would you like to do over from today?
  • What was the strongest emotion you felt today, and what did it relate to?
  • If today had a headline, what would it be?
  • How do you feel about what you were hoping to get done today, but didn't?
  • Of the people that crossed your path today, who was most memorable and why?
  • What matters most to you from today's activities?
  • What does tomorrow look like for you?
Now you have 10 questions to try out. Likely you have your own ideas of good alternatives to "How was your day?" We'd love to hear them!
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    Lavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships.

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