A simple first step toward a healthier relationship

By Lavern Nissley

Before my annual check-up each year my primary care doctor sends me to a lab to draw blood for several different panels. These include CBC with Auto Differential, Comprehensive Metabolic Panel, TSH without Reflex, Lipid Panel, and PSA Screening.  Dozens of levels are then sent to him electronically for analysis and communication to me.

There are also the basic metrics of temperature, pulse, oxygen level, and blood pressure that are secured during the actual visit.  I'm so grateful to be able to keep an eye on these many different levels that affect my health and that can trigger early warnings if needed.

Keeping relationships healthy also involves some way of capturing a current snapshot of how things really are. Ronda and I do this via a relationship assessment every several years just to make sure we're not missing anything that could create issues or problems for us.

Completing a relationship assessment is a great way to say, "We care about our relationship, and we want to know what's going well and what we need to work on to be at full health."

At Encompass, we've recently developed a simple 5-10 minute online assessment in conjunction with The RINGS Experience that is totally FREE and available for couples to use.

You can access this simple relationship assessment at https://www.encompasscc.org/assess.html. Each partner should complete it separately. Upon completion, you'll receive an immediate on-screen response and an email with attached PDF report. Areas in your relationship measured include the following:

• Commitment - loyalty and dedication
• Partner style and habits - personality knowledge and appreciation
• Family and friends - awareness of positive and negative influence
• Communication - asserting and listening well
• Transparency, honesty - trust and trustworthiness
• Connection, intimacy - emotional bonding of love and respect
• Handling stress - with proactivity
• Managing anger - validating while expressing appropriately
• Forgiveness - canceling relational debts
• Conflict resolution - productive outcomes to disagreements
• Financial management - functioning as a team
• Leaving a legacy - influencing those beyond your own relationship
• Relationship satisfaction - sense of fulfillment and fruitfulness
• Relationship intruders - addictions, affairs, abuse, mental health issues
• Relationship idealism - measure of realism, seeing things as they are

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With a total number of 300 points possible, you'll be able to see in which of 5 Tiers your relationship is currently operating, with Tier I being the most satisfied and healthy and Tier V the most stressed with plenty of room for growth. In addition, we are glad to merge the results together into one helpful chart upon request. All assessment results are confidential.

A relationship assessment isn't just for stressed couples. It's for healthy couples, too. A positive assessment report is encouraging and motivating. But for ALL couples, it's a first step in the right direction.

Take FREE assessment