By: Cindee Johnson
Relationship Coach The world paints for us vivid descriptions of love, especially during the month of February. From television ads urging us to buy our way into someone’s heart to social media posts making everyone an expert. Emotions run rampant. Feelings are full. Advice is plentiful. Wisdom is not. Yet, there are some other love insights I believe worth sharing—from elementary school children.
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By Ronda Nissley
Encompass Co Director Well not really…. But the problem I have with Valentine’s Day is the emphasis on singling out one day a year to celebrate an inferior type of love with gifts, flowers, candy and goofy cards – things that have little to do with Real Love. (Unless your love language is gifts.) In last week’s blog, Lavern highlighted three characteristics of real love as a way to recognize counterfeit love. Real, true love is unconditional, others-centered, patient and kind. In contrast, counterfeit love looks quite different... By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach Coordinator “We’re just in a rut, I guess.” We can’t seem to find joy in each other’s presence. We feel tired and frustrated with one another. Hearing this explanation from a friend referring to her marriage made me think back to a time when my husband and I were in a similar place, a “joy gap” in our marriage. Then I started to wonder, how did we get there? How did we get out? How do we keep from getting there again? By Kermit Rowe
Encompass Relationship Facilitator I’ve pastored for 18 years here in Springfield and ministered to couples as part of the Encompass Connection Center ministry for the past five. I’ve seen and witnessed the best and worst of intentions, passion that is both inspiring and misdirected, and communication that ranged from respectful to downright rude. I’ve seen hundreds of couples come through our doors in my time here, and thousands have come to us for help. And I’ve noticed they fall into three major categories... By: Cindee Johnson
Encompass Relationship Coach Traffic was flowing smoothly on the fairly crowded Columbus, Ohio, roadway. As we neared a major highway split, the vehicle next to us floored it. Cutting through the area marked with yellow hazard lines, the driver suddenly shifted into our lane barely missing a concrete barrier that could have tragically stopped him. Our Jeep automatically sensed the reckless vehicle and slowed nearly to a stop. My husband Dave looked ahead breathing a sigh of relief that the Jeep offers such great safety features. At the same time, I watched in the passenger side mirror commenting that the Jeep nearly stopping was not safe and we were going to get rear-ended! September's theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faithfulness. Kermit Rowe, one of our Relationship Facilitators shares about the skills needed for a lasting marriage, that many times are in short supply.
Devotion and faithfulness seem to be in short supply in our culture these days. So, when you see these two qualities alive and well in a lasting marriage, you’ve got to wonder what that couple has that about 50 percent of the couples who enter into holy matrimony don’t. By: Abby Glaser
Encompass Community Advocate When our Outreach Coordinator told me this month’s topic is devotion and faithfulness…my first thought was that I didn’t have anything to say on that topic! Which is ironic since I have been with my husband for 25 years now. I suppose I do know a thing or two! While the definition of devotion includes love and loyalty, which is what most think of when they hear that word, it also includes “enthusiasm!" That definitely got my brain thinking… when was the last time I expressed enthusiasm for my partner? The September theme for our social media and blog posts is devotion/faith. Gina Craun and her family experienced the ultimate loss, but through it all maintained their faith and devotion to each other and to God. See where it's brought them in the following blog post by Gina.
This was my 3 year old daughter's bold and unquestioning response when I asked her what she learned in her class while I was in service one Sunday. I laughed and asked her what she meant and, without even looking up from the sucker she was trying desperately to unwrap, she informed me, “They said that Jesus lives in my heart… so I think right now He’s cookin’ in there.” And you know what… I can’t disagree. When our oldest son, Cainan, was 2 years old he was playing on the floor with his cars and seemed a bit sluggish. When I felt his body burning up again, with yet another fever that month, we took him to our family doctor to get some antibiotics. Little did we know that within 24 hours we would be packing overnight bags and be admitted to the closest children’s hospital. Within hours, our world was turned upside down and the word “leukemia” entered our daily vocabulary. Because of the strength his specific type of leukemia possessed, chemo alone was not going to be enough. We began prepping for a bone marrow transplant. A transplant that our oldest son at 2 would be receiving and our youngest son, at 11 months old, would be donating bone marrow for. During this time I began an online journal. It was my goal to find God’s plan and purpose in each day and each step of our journey and share that hope and light with others. I found such encouragement in this because… you see what you look for. And I wanted to see what God was cooking up for our family through this. By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach & Event Coordinator There is a reason the phrase “for richer or poorer” is included in the marriage vows. Money is the second leading cause of divorce (behind infidelity.) Regardless of how much you love your spouse, money can be a major source of frustration and contention in a relationship… especially when you love to shop and OH, HOW I LOVE TO SHOP! I love it even more when there is a good deal to be had! I mean who can resist a “like new” accent chair in the exact color of the living room for HALF the original price? (Not me.) My dopamine receptors go crazy when I click that Marketplace tab and find aaaall the things! My easy-going husband is so good to me. He loves to hear excitement in my voice. So, when I start to talk about all the great deals I’ve found during the week on Marketplace, it’s cute and makes him giggle… until it doesn’t. When it’s time to get serious about saving money, I steer clear of the Marketplace tab. Here are a few suggestions that you might find helpful as I have, when I am trying to save money: By: Hollie Kowalski
Encompass Outreach Coordinator We spend 70-80% of our day engaged in some form of communication. 55% of that time is generally devoted to listening. The average person who has not worked to develop good listening skills will only remember about half of any recent conversation. 48 hours after the conversation, they are likely to only remember 25% or less… and then there’s me. My “working mom brain” has so many “open tabs” at any given time, I consider it a win if I remember my own children’s names on a daily basis. Because of the “coordinated chaos” in my head sometimes, I tend to “drift” when conversing with my husband-especially in the evening after a long day. We don’t have much time together during the week and I always want him to feel that he is important, that I value his thoughts and emotions. So… |
HostsLavern & Ronda Nissley are co-directors of Encompass. Married since 1978, both enjoy coffee, riding their tandem bicycle and working together to build strong relationships. TOPICS
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